Hello from Superwoman!

[Haggers]

Originally Posted by superwoman

Dear Mr.Haggers

Nice to see you loosening up and coming out of your shell.
A 'tackel tightening hornbag'. Noice mate!!
The rallying world is agog. Surely not. Surely you have many beautiful women in this sport, beautiful and intelligent.
You question my verisimilitude?
Wishing to not attenuate your concerns any longer, as watching small creatures in pain gives me no pleasure, and blue balls is so bad for your prostate health, and we all know where that gets you I'll help you out of your mental ordure.
I am the real McCoy.
I am not the ugly duckling that is only attractive after 10 beers.
Nor am I the beautiful woman who is dysgenic to men and their development from caveman to valuable citizen of society who can function for more than a day without thinking about mating.
I am a fun lady, with a wicked sense of humour, and an irrefrangably cheeky side that gets me into all sorts of trouble.And I am a fan of intelligent conversation and invigorating debate.
As for looks, I am attractive enough, or I would not have captured the hearts of many men, including one of your own.................but, alas, the photo above is not me. You have asked me to unbosom myself. For you Mr.Haggers, I will.

Some people in your club have met me..........................I am real.Not a sad, fat little man with multiple chins, multiple guts , a hairy back and a wizened little todger that you have been stroking while typing (a feat in itself one might say). Brilliantly described and vivid narration.

I have put my money where my mouth is and joined your fine club.
I have also enjoyed this immensely, and have never found such willing participants prepared to have a laugh and play with such verve.........I think you are all outstanding.

I look forward to meeting you all soon one fine day, should the fates allow.
Kat Rallycat (AKA just one of the boys)

Shall we rally??????????????

Dear, dear Superwoman

My most venereal dreams have come true. I pinch myself - no it is true - there is a like minded soul out there whose tempestuous breast heaves in expectation of those lucscious, lubricious moments in the service park as the zephyrs of Elf waft over our sweaty but lithe bodies - oblivious to the pullulating mountains of bum crack that heave and subside around the car next to us. I have gone quite faint....I think my gorge is rising. If only this weren't a Victorian novel.....

Haggers

[superwoman]

Bide your billet bibliophile.
The declension of this thread is oh but possible given your temararious response.
The world of sweat and bum cracks is beautiful in it's own primordial way.............some women like real men, not chest waxing fops.
You are obviously a lecher of prinked conversation.
Glad your gorge is rising.
awaiting your response to my datum.

[Haggers]

Originally Posted by superwoman

Bide your billet bibliophile.
The declension of this thread is oh but possible given your temararious response.
The world of sweat and bum cracks is beautiful in it's own primordial way.............some women like real men, not chest waxing fops.
You are obviously a lecher of prinked conversation.
Glad your gorge is rising.
awaiting your response to my datum.

I hope you are all reading this thread - there will be a vocabulary test at Bega. Superwoman will be the one with the thesauraus and Shorter Oxford Dictionary in the service park.

As for your datum - perhaps you should make contact with the lads who voted for Item B in the "Which is more Ghey thread?"


http://www.bmsc.com.au/forums/idle-t...re-ghey-2.html

Let me know what the response to your datum is from that quarter honky tonks.

Haggers

[superwoman]

Honky Tonks.............??????????
Stop it, you're turning me on!

I don't comment on gheys or ghey behaviour.
But I do like the carpet. Squishy on the tootsies!! Lovely.
I looked over the responses and the datum and after complilation and much reflection it is with pleasure that I can present you with the following qualified and quantified results. Tho the outcome is different .

(I've got that twitch in my neck again)
Kat

[Ric Cary]

Originally Posted by superwoman

Some people in your club have met me..........................I am real.Not a sad, fat little man with multiple chins, multiple guts , a hairy back and a wizened little todger that you have been stroking while typing (a feat in itself one might say).

So i guess that makes it clear its not JME

[superwoman]

Hi Ric,
Why does everyone think I'm you?
Surely no one else has my whack job sense of humour out there?
Kat

[Haggers]

Originally Posted by superwoman

Honky Tonks.............??????????
Stop it, you're turning me on!

I don't comment on gheys or ghey behaviour.
But I do like the carpet. Squishy on the tootsies!! Lovely.
I looked over the responses and the datum and after complilation and much reflection it is with pleasure that I can present you with the following qualified and quantified results. Tho the outcome is different .

(I've got that twitch in my neck again)
Kat

Mmm - IT skills as well. I had to blow it up (the image that is) because of my poor eyesight.

My wife and teenage daughter have become involved in this thread. It ran something like this:

Daughter: Dad are you having an affair?
Me: No - if I have was having an affair it would be much more discreet ( notice the spelling Superwoman) than on a public forum. I do have standards, low though they be.
Daughter: Yeah , right.
Wife: Do you really think any woman in her right mind would find the slightest thing attractive about your corpulent. flaccid excuse for a body?
Me: But she's clearly not in her right mind so I have falsified your hypothesis.
Wife: This is not a logic lesson you pathetic, snivelling hound. Although I do take your point in an abstract sort of way. Where was I you vile scrote? There you were last night prostrate on the floor gibbering away and I had to get Bean's engine hoist to get you off the floor. The indignity! It was either that or Whale Watch but they don;t do house calls.

Me: Oh Snooky, I am so sorry. It was all those syllables that turned my head. You know there is no one else. You have stood by me as I have systematically worked my way through animal kingdom - even Mother Theresa didn't have as much understanding. I know you baulked at the Jerusalem artichoke but that's our little secret....

THE END

[superwoman]

Hahahahahahahahahahaha,

No, no affairs.....sorry, I'm a hard woman to catch, too busy for all of that emotional heart tugging stuff. If you are having an affair, it isn't me!
Wrong introduction forum anyway!

I haven't laughed so hard in years as what I have over the past week- I'm in pain now.
And I have RSI.
And I've run out of Panadol.
And I only have one beer left in the fridge.
Aren't there other things to do on this forum, like talk about homo,
homo, homologated vehicle stuff????????

Moving right along..................................
Kat!

[Kate]

Haggers your such a fibber - there would have been at least $20 in the swear jar in that convo

[Rallyray]

I'VE WORKED IT OUT!

Superwoman is Ty Hoopers feminine alter ego caused by years of self abuse in front of the mirror with Foundation....

The games up Ty... Now go clean you computer before if fizzles and blows it up...All the talk from Haggers made you excited

[superwoman]

I just found a bug in my cereal..........
That's disgusting.

HUH?
Me?
Ty Hooper?
Ric Cary?
You can call my anything you want babe, as long as it's nice.

Now, where is that surface spray?
Kat

[Kaptainballistik]

Ok, Even Im shaking my head over this thread........Wierd and disturbing but you have to watch!

Back to the Gararge........................

[superwoman]

Hi everyone...........thanks for everyone's help in this introduction.

With the great suggestions, I have since found an OMP JetRally skid lid from the UK- paid only $180 aus..........they retail for $799 here. Got it today and it's soooooooo sexy, new and clean- I need to get it dirty!!
And I also almost have a Sparco 2 layer FIA suit for only $150aus- from the USA- apparently if was worn only once by a singer at Vegas for a concert at a V8 event.................apparently it has ELVIS on the name belt!!!!

So I've saved a heap of money, and got exactly what I wanted!!

Great suggestions, many thanks again for all of the help and advice provided throughout this thread.
Fun we have had, but I have been intently taking on the advice and following through.

Can I also highly recommend Sideways Rally School for putting up with me and my passionate disposition on numerous occasions now.........excellent coaching, brilliant crew running the show, and an overall fun and informative day...................Thanks Mick, Molly, Brendan, Luke, Jack, Tim and Rhiannon, and Greggy!

BMSC has got me up and running in the right direction, Sideways has me prepped, a few necessary licenses....and I'm all ready to go (hopefully not into anything with branches or two legs!!) Bring it!!

Now........the car

Thanks everyone,
KAT

[papa]

So how's the Superwoman settling in. Are you getting excited now. Sound's as though you've got your act together an juz about organised, good on u. All the best.....